Next time I will. . .

Complete the sentence above. I do everyday. Today it is, "Next time I will take the sub for a full day." Or, "Next time I wont wait as long to punish or reward my class." Or, "Next time I wont feel guilty when my students don't understand a concept because they were talking."
I think I have said it before. It is hard being the new, young, "fun", teacher. I don't want to be that teacher everyday. I want my students to take me seriously. I know I have faults and one of the biggest ones is the fact I can be distracted. The other is I am a kid at heart. Just ask my roommate who saw me cuddling a Cabbage Patch Kid, and a Build-a-Bear animal last night. I don't know what to do. I am at a loss.
We were going through long division and multiplication of two digit or more factors. I was having kids go through step-by-step what they were doing, and explaining why they carried, etc. The process was great. I was liking how things turned out. Then a few kids in the back corner ruined it for everyone by talking when I had asked them not to for the tenth plus time. So, I gave them the math book page instead of the workbook page. And I gave them 49 problems. Then they worked so well I cut it down to 38 problems. I hate using assignments that way. However my justification is the fact I wasn't sure which assignment I was going to give them, so they chose for themselves.
I want my kids to take me seriously. Sometimes I watch a few of the kids laughing to their friends when I say something. I guess it is because I am a little uncertain about what I am doing but I feel that they are laughing at me. grrr. I just wish I really had it all together. I don't and I hate it. I wish I could be the seasoned teacher who doesn't need to prove anything to anyone.