Lent

I found out one of my students gave up fighting with me for Lent. I think that was the best sacrifice he could have made. We might just make it through the rest of the year.

Big Steps

Today I was looking at the Utah State website thinking about how much I want to go and get my MEd (Masters of Education.) And before I knew if I found the application and started to fill it out. I can't fill it out all the way until I take my GRE test and figure out who I can get letters of recommendation from. But, I am hoping I can have it all done so I can apply for Fall semester. Wow! I'm excited and I can't wait until I can actually get into the program.
But, I have one problem. . . I need to take the GRE, does anyone know where I can register for it and any studying materials that will work. . . this is the one thing that scares me half to death.

Video of Birthday

This is a cute video my sister took at my party with my niece. Hope you enjoy.

Birthday Weekend. . . and More

Well, I wanted to get the weekend over with before I wrote about it then I got busy. . . and honestly I didn't feel like writing. But, here goes nothing.
Friday: Kyrie and I went to the ballet, Madame Butterfly. Beautiful but tragic tale of a Geisha who kills herself. There was blood and everything. Her white dress almost turned completely red (at least in a few spots) my one question is do they have a new costume every night? Or does the fake blood come out. . . hmmmmm.
Saturday: I had a "Single Awareness Day Party" and really it was a birthday party. It was a lot of fun. So many people there we just played games and watched a movie. And just talked. I don't do that kind of thing very often. So, it was kind of nice to have fun and get to know some people in my ward better.
Sunday: I went to church and then I went to my sister's house. It was my niece's birthday too, she turned one, and so we celebrated. My sister even bought us birthday crowns. Kaitlyn kept hers on pretty well. I was impressed. The cutest thing was when she would take hers off hand it to me wait until I put it on then runaway. Oh, it was adorable! I am so happy to have such a great birthday present for the rest of my life.
Monday: I was a bum pretty much all day. Except I did start to clean my room and then I bought a Wii. I LOVE it! I know some of you are thinking, "Allison a Wii and a new car! Are you crazy?!?" And I will answer yes I am. But, I like it and I can so I do. . . When I start school back up I won't be able to do this as much as I like so I have to do it now.
Tuesday: I slept and stayed home most of the day. Mostly because of the snow. I did venture out for my Love and Logic class. It was worth it. I finished cleaning my room and as of right now I have kept it clean. Hurray! It is nice to have somewhere clean to hang out. I also spent the day not worrying about school and how my kids were doing. I could really take another day or two away.
Wednesday: I got back to school and found out my class was horrible for the sub. I am so frustrated about that. One of the kids was downright defiant. (The best part about it is my class is telling me what happened. The sub just told me it was a rough day.) But other than that it was a typical day.
Thursday: Today. . . another typical day. I was supposed to be observed tomorrow so I have been getting ready for that. Well, my principal is sick so he won't be observing me until after Parent Teacher Conferences. Oh well, just means science will be low pressure tomorrow. I actually really am looking forward to the next few weeks with science. I am teaching my favorite topic in the CORE: Space, Moon Phases, and Seasons. It is going to be so much fun! I am so excited. I will let you all know how well it goes.
Now it is time for me to go. But here is an As heard in Miss. Duncan's Class from today.
I was waiting for my class to stop talking, so I pulled out my phone and was looking at old texts. And the topic of my "secret admire" came up. I laughed pretty hard and said, "I know who all my admires are." (Well, not exactly but that is much more witty than what I really said.) Then O said (while impersonating me), "If you don't call me Miss. Duncan I am going to break up with you." I started laughing. Sometimes they bring you to it. . . Then someone else said, "You have a behavior mark poster in your house and make him make a behavior check if he doesn't." Then, "And you have a bathroom punch and when he needs to go to the bathroom you make him make a punch." So, here I sit and think what a great idea! I will make my home life exactly like my school life! Blah! I am mean at school I don't want to bring that to my home. Except the behavior poster might help with roommate problems. . . hmmmmm.

Mental Health Day

I am taking a mental health day next week. And I need it. After fighting vertigo today during math, and fighting with students the rest of the day. I just can't wait until 5:00 tomorrow when my "Birthday Weekend" starts. It is going to be the best weekend. Tomorrow my roommate is taking me to the Ballet. I've talked her into dressing up for the evening. Then Saturday, I am helping my brother move into his new house. Then I having a party. I decided I didn't want to sit around on Valentines again so I am having a party. Sunday I am going to my sister's to celebrate my birthday along with Kaitlyn who gets the fun job of being my FAVORITE birthday present ever. Monday is President's Day so I am just going to relax for a day. And Tuesday I am taking my mental health day. I am so looking forward to the day. And the fact I can just sit and do anything I want for one day. And not have to worry about my class.

Now about school yesterday I did a fun activity. I trained my students to move around the room when a timer went off. (It was fun actually.) Then I put on the song, "You are Loved by Josh Groban" and we went around the room and filled out compliments to everyone in the class. Then I typed them up. . . with some help. It was great to see my students today to as they read their compliments and the way they were all so happy to see what everyone said about them. It was such a great activity, and one I think I will use again.

Last, my wonderful students are starting to act so bad. I don't know what to do. However, I keep getting told it will get worst before it gets better. I had a student today say I am mean in class. I am fine after school, but during school I am mean. I care, but not enough to let him know. He isn't going to win. (Yes, this is the same student who I had the hard time with a few days ago.) I took the information I was given and assessed it. I think I could be nicer in my tone. . . but overall I think I am pretty nice to my class. I have to watch what I say and how I say it. . . Anyway that is pretty much what is going on. I am so excited to have the weekend to enjoy and the one day to take a break.

Another Fun Day

So, on Friday I feel like I was completely inspired. As I sat at my desk trying to correct some essays and the students were writing new ones. The student who sits right in front of my desk decides that I am the question answerer. If he wants to know something, I am the teacher I should know and so he asks, and asks, and asks, to the point I am not getting anything finished, and he isn't getting anything finished. So, I decide to give him a notebook, he can write any question he has in this notebook and I will answer it. I promise, it might not be that day but it will get answered. So, I hand it to him, and one of my other students wants one, to the point that every single student gets this magical notebook. I am thinking to myself, this will be great. Now, any comment they have that will distract from the class will now go in the notebook. And honestly, I am loving it. I spent most of the day on Friday answering questions. Today, I took a different approach, I am only going to answer at the end of the day, and give them back. I got some good information, and some good things are happening. I am starting to build some relationships back up. I hope. And we'll see.
Fast forward to today. The student who inspired the idea, kept bugging the girl he sits by. During Study Hall, I sent her group to the restroom. He felt that it was the perfect time to lounge out on her seat. I told him to put his feet down and to turn and face forward. He put his feet down, but refused to face forward. I counted to five then I told him to go outside and to comeback in when he knew what to do. I did one thing in this whole thing that was bad, I went out into the hall and engaged him for a minute. I just told him, I would love to have him back when he was ready, if he wanted to stay in the hall for the rest of study hall I was fine with it. Then I went back into the classroom. He came up and asked if he could talk to me, and I flat out told him no. I have spent numerous amount of minutes in the hall with this kid talking to him about the same things. I don't want to spend my class time working with this, again. So, he went to the principal who told him to go back and to do what I told him to do. He came back to me and tried to engage me while I was finishing up somethings for the end of the day. I just looked at him and said, "I gave you that notebook for a reason. This is the perfect time to use it I would like you to write what you want to say. This way I can process what you are trying to tell me and you can process what I am trying to tell you."
"I don't know why I have to write when I can just tell you."
"Because, I am not going to talk to you when you are in this condition." (At this point he was starting to cry with frustration)
"Well, I want to talk about this now."
"Nope, I want you to write it out for me."
One other student pipes in, "She's right, I had a concern and I wrote it down for her and we are working it out. She can understand my point of view and I can understand hers."
"That is what I want you to do. Just write it."
"Why won't you talk to me?"
"Just write it."
You can see where the rest of the conversation went. He left the classroom just like every other day with his head down and mad at me. And I am beginning not to care. He won't let go of the bad feelings he has for me and I don't want to fight it anymore. So, I am not going to. I was talking to the kindergarten teacher I am friends with and we started talking about this program "Love and Logic." I am taking a class for it right now and I feel that I haven't been able to use it in my class very effectively. Until my friend said something about if I would have talked to him he would have won. And she is right. My refusal to talk to him and to allow him the time made it so I was still in control. Like I said my biggest problem was that I engaged him during the time he was in the hall.
I really do like this kid. He is a good kid. But, he isn't treating me with the respect I as his teacher deserve. And I am kind of disappointed in it all.
I'll let you know if he writes to me and tells me what he wants to say. But, I don't think he is going to. But, whatever he writes I am sure I can refute every point one-by-one.

Things To Think About

I had a couple of things come up on Friday and now I have somethings to think about. I had a student draw a picture of me. And how I wish I would have kept it. I liked it, found the picture funny. It was me, with horns and standing at a door that said, "death camber," with skulls on the ground. I'm saying, "Dum kids. I hate them all." Or something to that effect. It started me thinking though. I am putting this persona out there to my students that I don't care. When I really do. After my principal talked to the student who drew this amazing likeness of me, he picked three random kids and talked to them about me. And all around it has come to I am inconstant, and some of them don't know that I care. Here it is half way through the year. And they are not sure if their teacher cares. That is a serious problem and one that needs to be fixed immediately. So, I've been thinking all weekend what I can do to let them know how much I really care. I haven't come to the perfect solution yet, I have some ideas and I am going to work on them.
As my principal and I talked about this, he came to the conclusion that I am guarded. As an adult he can see what I do and how much I care. But the students cannot. They don't know how to read the adults as well. At first I was thinking he was talking about my telling of personal information. Then I thought about it more and I have realized I am all around guarded. I don't let a lot of people in too deeply. I hold back until I am sure you are someone to be trusted. I don't show too much emotion for fear that if I do my heart will be broken. So, it is now time to let that go, at least in the classroom, these kids need to know that their teacher cares and wants them to be happy in school. It is also time for the teacher to leave outside emotions outside. And only allow what is happening at school effect what she is doing at school. I will keep you updated on all of this. It is going to be interesting to see what happens while I make these changes. Hopefully they will be good.